I am an ER nurse. I am so tired of bringing a patient meds and having the whole family ask “Did the doctor recommend that?” No, the janitor thought some norepinephrine might fix your mom’s BP of 50/10, but she seemed pretty confident so I went with it.
FRIENDLY REMINDER: ur tummy is cute as HECK and u should eliminate anyone that tells u otherwise
HAHAHA HOLY SHIT WE WERE LOOKING AT PICTURES OF SURGERIES IN CLASS AND ALL THE GUYS WERE HOOTING AT THE SLICED BREAST ONES AND THEN THE TEACHER SWITCHED TO A PENIS PIC WHERE IT WAS CUT OPEN AND SOME 300LB JOCK DOUCHEBAG FAINTED RIGHT OUT OF HIS CHAIR BOYS ARE WEAK BOYS ARE FUCKING WEAK
you mean to tell me
that there was a god damn CUT OPEN BOOB
AND BOYS WERE STILL SEXUALISING IT
FUCKING MOTHERFUCKING FUCK DOES NO ONE SEE HOW FUCKED UP THIS IS
MY MOM SET A TOWEL ON THE COUNTER AND IT JUST FUCKING CAUGHT ON FIRE
THERE WAS NOTHING NEAR IT IT JUST SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTED
Is your mother Spencer Shay
He just gets slowly less concerned
"Post" Modernism. http://ift.tt/1fHYXbW
omfG my spanish flatmate just turned to me and said ‘i need to ask you something embarrassing’ so i sort of said oh yeah sure no problem
and he was like
'people keep telling me they are having 'two sex'?'
'i ask them for something, and they say they will do it after two sex or to give them two sex? is this a common thing here?'
they mEAN ‘TWO SECS’ AS IN TWO SECONDS THE POOR BOY THOUGHT WE’RE ALL ONLY GONNA DO STUFF FOR HIM AFTER HAVING SEX TWICE B L E S S
it’s been a day and its already come down to this
Ok but this is one of my favorite Disney endings because they decided to be happy together as frogs rather than try and find a way to be human and by finding that happiness they got to be humans again like that is rad as hell thank you Disney
I’m actually really cute if you don’t look at me
teacher: its pajama day
that one kid: WHAT IF I SLEEP NAKED HAAAHAAHA
wanna know what a cow looks like washed and blow dried?
that is what a cow looks like washed and blow dried
FLUFFY MILK HORSE
I fell in love the way Stiles gets out of his car; slowly, then all at once. [x]